Its that time again!
My long term regular readers may be used to this cycle by now, but for my new readers let me get you up to speed. I seem to get stuck in a dating cycle that I never seem to catch myself in until its just a tad too late. I meet a guy, cautiously date them, slowly get to know them, develop a crush, enjoy the attention and flattery, slowly open up my heart, watch the guy get bored/distant/flake-out, get dumped, and then give myself a big old slap upside the head and ask myself “how in the hell did I end up falling for that AGAIN”.
Seems Mr. Teacher either was a very good chameleon or like many before him, wasn’t ready to date/not over his ex/just wasn’t that into me.
Just as I thought I was getting better at spotting guys who are destined to break my heart, I find myself on the receiving end of another dumping. I really don’t want to hash out details other than to say that I think that after I met his best friend they might not have liked me very much and could have possibly put the idea into his head that its best to cut and run. Either that or that if I bring up on my blog a guy I am dating its just fate that it never works out with that person. HAHA.
Sadly its beginning to look like I need to take myself off the dating market until I can figure out how I end up in this pattern time after time. Yes, I do think I have become better at sorting out the jerks looking for hook-ups and one-night-stands, but I don’t like dating guys who don’t know that they are not ready to date. One of my friends even asked if maybe I’m not ready to date, which I suppose could be a viable reason too. For me I do think I am ready, but in some ways still trying to figure out what kind of guy is best for me. I am not as blond to that as I was about 2 years ago, but in many ways I don’t think I met every type of guy out there yet. As much as I just want to pull my boot straps up and get back on the dating-wagon (so to speak), I really think I need to just step away. Mr. Teacher was a guy who was very very different from the rest I had dated in the past, and in many ways had all of the characteristics I was looking for in a guy. After I first started to go out with him I kept telling myself he was too good to be true, then I thought “wow, did I actually meet a great guy… i guess they do exist”. Given recent events with him, he was too good to be true, and no great guys don’t exist (or at least my my circle of life).
Knowing me when I am unattached I can’t help but browse through the dating websites. I think I do want to try and not contact or “flirt” with any guy for at least a month, two or three months would be ideal too. I just need to take a break and just decompress and enjoy myself. I did say I wanted to do Roller Derby, no dating would free up my time, hmmmm.
This whole experience with Mr Teacher has inspired me to want to do some more reading and research about dating. Kind of get a clean slate perspective and maybe try and figure out how I keep picking guys who are jerks. I even had the idea of possibly writing my own book on dating, thinking of entitling it; He Just Wasn’t Good Enough For You.
Think of the bright side in all this. Me not being attached to anyone means I will be updating my Dating Wall of Degenerate Hopefuls page more often now. Always a bright side to any bad situation.